We all need friends. Friends add so much to our lives with laughter and trust, accountability, creating new experiences, sharing with each other.
So how do we know if we’re in a healthy friendship or one that brings us down? How do we know if it’s a good idea to say farewell to a friendship that’s been going for years and years even though it’ll hurt to say the words? How can you tell if someone new is worth getting to know better? Things like this can be so hard to determine and deal with because as adults, we crave friendships, even if we don’t think we do. Here are some things to think about:
- Does the person support you? Yes? Ok, what about if they’re not succeeding in something but you are, do they still support you and give you quality advice, help, and feedback? If your answer is “no” then it’s time to look at that relationship. Look into yourself as well. Real friends always build each other up, not drag them down! Even though it can be hard to say some things, there’s a way to say it without hurting that person. Real friends can be brutally honest while still having all the right intentions but they should think about how the way they say something will effect the other person!
- What does the other person bring to the friendship? Are they solely a mooch who is living in your shadow, constantly asking favors from you? Do they reciprocate the nice-doing? If your friendship feels like it’s one sided, it probably is! Even though it’s difficult those feelings need to be brought up and talked about. Just like in a spousal relationship, sometimes friendships can get monotenous and that’s ok! Real friends push each other out of their comfort zones sometimes though and that can make things fun!
- Is your friend happy to hear about the things you had fun doing with your other friends? Are they jealous? If they’re jealous then what’s the reason? Real friends are happy for you that you’ve got other people to connect with and be inspired by!
- Do you have common interests? This one is kind of a given and not every single thing in your lives have to be the same but if you’ve ever had a friend that’s right there where you’re at, we all know it’s just so easy!
- Do you give each other grace? Grace is given to all of us from God freely but sometimes it can be hard to do that in our own lives. Real friends give grace! If you’re having trouble doing this try to be harder to offend and easier to forgive. Remember that we all need to try to be as much like Jesus as we can and that’s exactly what he did!
If you're curious as to who the hot little number in the photo is with me, it’s my friend Ashleigh from MyMotherhood.Life! If you knew us you might think we’ve known each other ever since high school (far too many years ago...) but nope...we’ve been friends for about two years and counting and it’s been so fun getting to know her and her family! Why is it so easy to be friends for us? We both have kids around the same ages, we’re bloggers!, we’re social Media influencers, photographers, we’re sarcastic and real, we help each other learn, we don’t keep ahold of our tips and help for each other.
Fun fact: Ashleigh and I met online. That’s right, we met because our kiddos all “modeled” child clothing brands on Instagram and now look at us... blogging our way through the world, photographing all the way!
I encourage you to take a look at your friendships if you’re feeling like you’re missing out or it’s one sided! Also, to learn more about Ashleigh, visit her site here!